Most of the parents want to be good parents. Good parenting can give children happiness, but it is also challenging. Because the situation of every family is different, every child is unique. It will be difficult for parents to know what the best thing to do in different situations. In order to help you, recently we did research from hundreds of successful parents and we make up a list of 22 certain parentings ways they shared. These tips will have a good impact on parenting.
1. Be a Good Example
Do not just tell your children what to do. Show them what to do. Because we often learn by imitation. We will repeat the actions of others to know them and adsorb them into our own. Children are as well, they watch everything their parents do very carefully. So you should be the person you would like your children to be, do positive behavior and attitude, have empathy towards your children’s emotions. They will follow.
2. Teach Children to Face Challenges Positively
People who face challenges and difficulty positively are much more likely to succeed than those who don’t. This attitude develops in childhood and adolescence. Let children know the challenge is hard but fun. They can learn many ways and overcome challenges.
3. Keep Kind and Positive Parenting
Give your children positive experiences. They will be able to experience positively themselves and do them to others. Although It is hard to keep positive in the discipline, positive discipline is possible. You need to teach your children what is right or wrong. Setting limits is important for good discipline. But do avoid spank. spanking can lead to short-term compliance. However, this doesn’t teach children right from wrong. It only causes that they are afraid of something. Then they prone to avoid getting caught. Children who are spanked or hit are more likely to become bullies and use violence to solve problems. To find out the reason behind children’s behavior, then be kind and positive when you teach them something.
4. Let Children Realize the Meaning of Sacrifice
Children find greater happiness when they give to others sacrificially. Most of us just care about our own needs. If we care about the needs of others as well, we will be happier. Teaching your children to contribute will make a positive impact on them. When your children think more of the contribution than the taking, they’ll more likely have a meaningful life.
5. Talk and Listen to Your Children
Communication is very important for integrating children’s minds. It is also the best strategic way to embed friendships into your children. You can build a better relationship with your children through communication and they will talk to you when they have problems. Communication will help your children integrate different parts of their minds. To do that, talk to them when they have trouble, ask them to describe what happened and how they felt. There is no need for giving solutions directly for them, just listen to them and ask simple questions will let them know their experiences and integrate their minds. Then help them deal with their trouble.
6. Have Reading Time for Children
Reading to children and other shared educational toys with parents increases their vocabulary very much. Children who have reading time hear words more than three times words the children in the non-reading home hear. Set a daily reading time and be flexible in the time when you are reading. The attention of toddlers is short, so choose short books and stop reading when their attention is not on it. Try not to use long sentences, use words they understand and add comments or sound. Show your children pictures about the story. Making interaction is important too when reading to them.
7. Have a Good Relationship with Your Spouse
Children from harmonious families are happier and more successful than children from conflicting or broken families. Parents with a healthy marriage can parent children better. Building a strong relationship with your spouse is very important, even though it is hard sometimes. Here is some advice for that:
· Treat your spouse with kindness and politeness
· Fix problems without blaming each other
· Tell your spouse your future plans
· Say complimentary to your spouse
· Learn to accept and change the bad habits of your spouse
· Being right is sometimes not that important for marriage
· Ask your spouse what can you do to be a better husband or wife
8. Share Music with Your Children
Sharing babies great music will result in metabolic changes that benefit their weight gain. They will have better medical results in the future. Singing nursery rhymes and dancing when holding your children in your arms, and using instruments like horns or drums is interesting and educational. the introductory interaction of music will make toddlers smile more.
9. Build Your Children’s Self-Esteem
Children start developing their sense of self when they are babies, they see themselves through their parents’ eyes. Your every expression like Your tone or your body language will be absorbed by them. Especially Your words and actions affect their developing self-esteem most. When your children made a mistake, avoid making using words like “you did a stupid thing”, these words will cause damage to the mental health of children. You should choose what to say carefully and be empathetic. Telling them that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them even though you don’t like what they did.
10. Encourage Your Children to be Independent
Independence helps children develop a sense of self-direction and self-control. Children are more likely to be successful when they have the ability of self-direction and self-control. It is normal that children seek to be dependent because it is part of human nature to want to control themselves rather than to be controlled by someone else. but many parents mistakenly see their independence as disobedience.
11. Have Quality Time with Your Children
It is difficult for parents and children to get together for a family meal, children are not happy with that at all. But it is possible to fix this. You can get up 10 minutes earlier in the morning to eat breakfast with your child and go out to walk together after dinner. You can set a “gift night together” each week to let your children decide how to spend the time. Adolescents are prone to need less attention from their parents than the younger ones. Because there are fewer opportunities for parents and their children to get together, you should do your best to be available when your children want to talk or have family activities like games together. Doing that can let you know more about your children and their friends in important ways.
12. Implement Rules after Discussing and Explaining
Parents have expectations for their children, but most parents often overexplain to young children and underexplain to adolescents. Because what is obvious to you may not be clear to your child. They may don’t have the judgment or experience that you have. So when you are setting some rules, talk to your children before implementing them. By doing that, your children will be a part of the proceedings and realize that they should not do something. Having discussions with your children can make them feel important and build their self-esteem too.
13. Make a Healthy Diet for Children
A healthy diet is particularly important before age three. Healthy diets can have a good impact on children’s intelligence. foods high in fat and sugar reduce a toddler’s later IQ, while healthy items such as rice, pasta, fish, and fruit raise IQ.
Nutritionists recommend that babies and toddlers primarily eat homemade baby food that is freshly prepared, unsalted, and unsweetened to train their taste buds to select healthy foods later in life. While all babies are born with preferences for sweets, the rest of their taste preferences are learned as they begin to eat pureed and solid foods.
Unfortunately, parents are working at a disadvantage here. Children’s favorite foods are generally high in sugar, fat, and salt, such as sweetened yogurt, apple juice, Goldfish crackers, and macaroni and cheese. These foods shouldn’t be included in your children’s diet. Healthier foods include low-fat yogurt, scrambled eggs, baked sweet potato chips, hummus, raisins, fruits (not high-sugar fruit juices), peanut butter with banana, whole grain cereals, and nuts.
14. Decide Something with Your Children
Let your children decide something themselves. It is more suitable for adolescents who may feel angry when no one asks them before making a decision for them. When making decisions about your children, you should talk to them to know their preference instead of jumping to a conclusion directly. In the meantime, It is also a good way to teach them how to make decisions.
15. Be Consistently Responsive
Children raised by parents who are consistently responsive tend to develop better in emotion, socialization, and mentality. Let your children know that you’ll always be there when they need you. Be a warm and safe haven for your children to live.
16. Love Your Children But don’t Spoil Them
Love your children but do not spoil them. Spoiling children is usually the result of giving children things like leniency, lower expectations and material possessions instead of love. Loving your children can through doing things like giving them hugs, spending time with them and listening to their talk. These acts of love can give your children emotional warmth and contentment.
17. Encourage Children Develop Socialization
Children who socialize well have more friends and they are happier than those who are not good at socialization. Help your children develop social skills.
Here are some tips for helping children socialize :
· Share with others
· Give feedback
· Take differences
· Respect others
· Care about others feelings
· Make eye contact
· Be positive
· Listen to others
· Never interrupt others
· Cooperate with others
· Help others
· Compliment others
· Be polite and warm
· Ask others help
18. Think about Your Own Childhood
Many of us want to parent our children differently from how our parents parented us. But usually, when we start parenting, we do just as our parents did. Thinking about your own childhood is a step towards understanding why you parent that way. Take note of what you want to change and think of how you do it differently, and try to change your behavior the next time when it comes. Just keep trying on it if you don’t succeed at first.
19. Listen When Your Children Want to Say Something
Listening to your children is important in parenting when they want to share something which may seem not important but means a lot to them. Do not refuse to hear them when you are available. Award them when they are truthful and honest. Because children who are reprimanded for speaking the truth may eventually prefer a lie to avoid getting punished.
20. Get Your Children Away from Television
Watching television is not a healthy activity for everyone, particularly bad for children under the age of two.
We found toddlers who watch television do as follows:
-Less active than other peers
-Avoid social contact
-More likely fall behind in language development
-Less likely to develop a full range of eye development
-Prone to have more problems
But if you allow your children to watch television, you best to watch with them so you can discuss what they see. But it is preferable that you have regular reading time for them instead of letting them watch television.
21. Change Your Parenting for Your Children
If you are often frustrated by children’s behavior, you may over-expect what your children should do. Children’s environments will affect their actions, so you should be able to adjust the environments to change their behavior. If you keep saying no to your children, you may need to change parenting so that things are in limits. It will reduce frustration for both of you. You have to gradually change your parenting ways because what works with children now may not work well when they grow up.
22. Focus on Your Parenting Goal
Figure out what your parenting goals are and keep focus. If you want your children to do well in school, be productive, responsible and independent, and have a happy and meaningful life. you should spend more time on achieving those goals.
Most of these parenting ways are clear and easy. Although you can not do all of them all the time, you can keep trying on them. It will gradually help you form your own good parenting style. The process of keeping doing may be hard and struggling. But there is a saying that the good part usually comes after the bad part.